Being on this side of the church is weird. It’s strange to know that 99.9% of the difficulties that a pastor faces, the obstacles that take up so much of the time have so little to do with spiritual health and well-being of the church.

song selection, money, personal preference, opinions, opinions, carpet color, paint color, the wrong colors, the right colors, the pastor’s clothes aren’t right, the pastor’s wife’s clothes are great, but the kids…

Just give me Jesus. I want people to know Jesus the way I know Him. I want to know Jesus more. I want people to teach me how they know Jesus. I want to pray for people who need Jesus; I want to see miracles. I want to learn. I want to teach. I want the church to be the church. I want Jesus to be proud of us, his children.

I want it to be simple. I want people to practice forgiveness when they’re offended and seek forgiveness when they mess up.  I want to see people who are desperately in need of salvation find it through our precious Jesus.  Let church be simple.

It’s a phrase developed by the liberal crowd to identify the agenda of  conservatives to prohibit abortion.  And let me tell you, there is a war. But, it’s not what they say it is.

The war on women in our society is asking them to be like men. I’m not talking about equal pay for equal work; that’s obvious. And I’m also not talking about the fundamentalist Christian view that a woman’s place is only in the home. I am a full-time working mom. In this country, we refuse to celebrate and embrace what makes us women. Uniquely created.  One major thing that sets us apart is our ability to  support life. Instead of embracing that gift, what the mainstream tells us is that we should destroy that life any time we want, for any reason, or no reason at all.  The war is on.  It strips women of the most precious gift that makes a woman a woman and mistakes that thievery for freedom. It makes us choose between making career advancements and families.  It’s bosses that ask, “Are you having another?”  and unpaid maternity leaves.

I know it’s complicated. I’m a high school teacher and have seen plenty of teenage girls make mistakes that have huge impacts on their futures. But the child doesn’t destroy life, he or she is a life.

I am a woman. I don’t want to be treated like a man. I want better than that!

I’m not who I was.  And I am grateful to God for His regenerative work in my life.  I can barely identify with the person I used to be which is generally a source of joy, peace, and fulfillment.

However.  I’ve found in working in ministry it is important to remember my sin state.  As Ephesians 2:8-9 states that it is by grace I’ve been saved and not by works. It’s all of God’s work so I cannot take credit for the person I am becoming.  And so it is with people that frustrate me when the truth is clear and they don’t cling to it. When it’s obvious what the next step in their faith should be, but they don’t take it.

It is by grace that I am who I am. It is by grace that those who frustrate me will become who they will be in Christ. Because I am changed, I believe others will be changed. But the frustration is just a mis-remembering of how I got to where I am. I cannot boast. And I cannot be impatient with the work of grace in others, nor expect their journey to look like mine. I can rejoice in the grace continually given to me and keep moving on.

Philippians 1:6…

Shortly after he was born, I was attempting to put words to my experience and emotions. The best I could do was this line: “I never knew what I didn’t have, until I got to hold what I have now.” It is an awesome experience to hold your first born in your arms for the first time.

Quickly, however, I began considering what we’ve done. There are so many possibilities a new life brings. Joys and heartache. What kind a man will this sweet babe become? What role will I play? What a great opportunity…a great responsibility.

My husband and I started praying for this boy long before he was being knitted together. And we gave him up to God then. Although my personality would rather control and cling to him,  he’s not just mine.  He’s God’s Will.

Love you, Little Buddy. <3

I’m horrified and saddened by the news of the shooting in Connecticut. And, I feel it is time to speak out. I realize that many will simply discount my thoughts as another one of “those” people, but hear me out before dismissing me so easily.

I work in a high school. I observe kids every day and notice all sorts of behavioral shifts, damage, and disorders that our teens deal with daily. One of the most disturbing trends I see is the addiction to violent video games. Do you know what our kids are doing? They walk into school every morning nearly comatose because they stay up half the night playing games where they kill and pillage. These kids who get addicted to these games do not have a healthy sense of reality. I can tell because of the way they talk.  They chat with classmates and brag about the awards and levels they earned and how they smoked this guy and killed this many. I often interrupt them and advise, “You do realize that all you actually did last night was sit in front of a TV or computer screen and move your thumbs, you didn’t actually kill anyone.”  Their reply, “It’s the same thing, Mrs. Kelly.”  Honestly to these kids playing the game is the same as killing people in their minds. These are also the kids who hate school and most of their classmates and their teachers because they are too tired to find any value in friendships or academics. Instead, they fantasize about their games and can’t wait to return to them.  You don’t believe me, ask them!

It’s these kids that bring their video game world to ours. It’s these kids who can’t get high enough on their games anymore and begin contemplating the horrifying tragedy that sickens us as we watch the news today. Everyone always asks, “How could someone do this…”  They do it every night; is it really that big of a stretch?

We don’t have time to wait for legislation. Obviously putting a “M”sticker on the outside of a video game is not going to prevent these kids from playing those games.  A “mature” person would not be interested in pretending to kill people. Parents, start parenting. Learn to say “NO” for the benefit of your child and the kids around him or her. Youth pastors, stop having gaming parties with violent games. Churches and pastors, start speaking out.  The kids in your church are participating in these games.

Instead, let’s live out Philippians 4:8”Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

This verse is trailing me wherever I go. It must be the work of

the Holy Spirit since it is so persistent.

Galatians 2: 20…

“I have been crucified with Christ   and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.   The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God,  who loved me  and gave himself for me” (NIV).

Here’s my sticking point. Why not write, I am devoted to Christ so that I no longer live…

No, it says I’ve been crucified with Christ. Crucifixion was a messy, gory, cruel

business. I’m not sure all that seems so necessary. I’d rather Paul wrote,

I’ve been inconvenienced by Christ….I’ve had to sacrifice…but to be

crucified with Christ?

Metaphorically, if you haven’t become a mashed, bloody pulp of a man

for the sake of Christ, then maybe you haven’t had the encounter

Christ desires to have with you.  He will wreck you. Beware.

Crucified with Christ…

Praise His Holy Name!

For the past five years or so, I have committed to the same prayer every Christmas and Easter season.  It’s a simple one, but I pray it because I want to learn the deeper things of God.  I do not want to fall into the temptation of routine and miss what God desires to reveal.  So far, I’ve been blown away by how faithfully God answers this simple prayer.

My prayer: “Show me more of You, teach me something new this (Christmas or Easter) season.”

Through a set of personal circumstances that seemed rather devastating at the time, God allowed me to see the days leading to Christ’s crucifixion differently. I understood a bit more the verse in Galatians 2 which says,”I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

This brought my thoughts to Christ and the garden of Gethsemane. I’m not positive this is theologically sound, because I am not theologian. But I feel it is compelling enough to share.

I believe there is a point in time in our Christian walk where our physical reality (what we see, do, touch, understand) conflicts with our spiritual calling.  It creates a deep, deep conflict because the choice boils down to sight versus faith. I believe even Jesus experienced the agony of that decision when he prayed twice, ” My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.”  (Matthew 26).  Jesus’s spiritual calling was so extraordinary that we can’t really comprehend all of it. Certainly, we will not be asked to take on such a monumental task, but in our own way we must suffer in our garden. There will be a time when we will be asked to choose between our physical reality and our spiritual calling if we keep pursuing the deeper mystery of God.

What an example of faith we have in Christ.  Thank you, Jesus!

 
Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.  Hebrew 11:1

Sounds a bit morbid. Who wants to think of such a thing? Where is the encouragement in that thought?

I’ve learned the importance of the death-bed. Recently, a dear uncle of mine passed from this life to the next earlier then we expected.  I learned a valuable lesson as I realized that my  visit with him in the hospital would be my last.  Those gathered around his death-bed is what matters in life. Why death teaches so much about life is one of those great mysteries. However, what was reaffirmed to me was that relationships matter. Relationships last. The impact that he had on his children, his wife, his family, and his community is the thing that matters.  The hundreds of people who poured into the church during his funeral showed that he must have understood what matters.

As a young person, I easily get consumed with personal ambition. I have goals and dreams. But, it is so important to live with a correct frame of reference. It’s so important to remember what matters.  Will I care if I owned a beautiful home?  Will I care where I worked? Who would be at my funeral? How would they tell the story of my life?  I want to live in such a way that they’d say  that I was a woman who knew God and loved Him and loved people.

I may never obtain the job I have always dreamt of . I may never obtain the “things” I wish I had. But, I can invest in what matters.

The Bible says in John 15  “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.  Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends“.  Just before these verses Jesus speaks about his love for us and just following these verses he talks about being our friend. So, Jesus showed us “the greater love” by laying his life down for us so that we could be called friends.  It is one of the foundational doctrines of Christianity that sets it apart from other religions. God would die for us. And at the same time, we assume that this type of love won’t actually be asked of us….its reserved for the spiritual elite or perhaps military personnel, who do willingly sacrifice their lives for our nation’s sake.

This Christmas season, I’ve been wondering what this verse would look like in everyday life. I’ve come up with only one conclusion.  Christ picked up our pain, our punishment, our sin and carried it away. Perhaps we cannot carry another’s punishment, and certainly cannot carry away their sin.  We can help carry their pain.  Maybe what love is the willingness to carry a piece of someone else’s pain. As a pastor’s wife, I see people’s pain. The loss of loved ones, health, jobs, children, security, independence, it is so much sometimes that it’s hard take it in without getting overwhelmed. But,what if as a body we could all carry a piece of their pain? We all might move about with more ease. Laying down the life that’s all about me and caring enough, stopping long enough to remember their pain and pray.

Merry Christmas!  

 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—  not by works, so that no one can boast.  For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.  Ephesians 2:8-10

Christmas is coming!  It is an important time for families to gather together.  One of those times in a year when people return to church. It’s a good time for churches to share the gospel with those who are yet to find saving faith. All of which is good….beautiful even.

This is our 4th year in “official” youth ministry where one of the major goals is sharing the gospel with teens.  We’ve noticed a trend in the many youth conferences, rallies and camps we’ve attended aimed to be evangelistic in nature.   Many present a truncated version of the gospel that can be summed up in two words:  Believe. & Receive.  It’s not the whole truth.

This brings me to Epheisans 2.  and a simple question: What is the free gift of salvation?   “Free” means it cannot be purchased, earned, or bartered. You can’t “do” anything to qualify for it.  Free doesn’t mean it is cheap, easily obtained, or there is no type of obligation . The gift of salvation is free to us in that we can’t earn it, but it certainly wasn’t free for Christ and it carries a cost for us, too.  If your faith hasn’t cost you anything, then I wonder if your faith as saved you. You must be changed through the work of the Holy Spirit.  Jesus asks for your life….to deny yourself and follow after Him. To reject this world and be transformed. It costs everything…your life and the way you want to live it.  A gift with no pricetag, but of great price. The message puts it this way in Luke 17:33, “If you grasp and cling to life on your terms, you’ll lose it, but if you let that life go, you’ll get life on God’s terms.”